We go through life hoping and praying that we will fit in. We want to have friends, love our families and get good grades. Sail through our education, get a job and move up the career ladder. We are normal. However, what about if we’re not. These days there is a lot of chatter about invisable disabilities and how important it is to recognize and support people when they look perfectly healthy but are a mess in the inside. I have many invisible disabilities but within a moment, my disabilities became visable. The nice thing about invisible is that you can hide it from the world. When you don’t want people to know, you can curl up and hide from the world. In the mall, you can fit in with society. Once the invisible becomes visible the world changes. People can hide cancer until their hair falls out. Same with me.
The day I got the walker and Foot brace, my invisible became visible. This changed my perception of myself. I felt like I was useless, and that the world was staring at me. It’s hard to go out- and not feeling judged- even when I’m not judged. The feelings get bolted up in my stomach and anxiety wrenches and one day I explode. The feelings of judgement, hurt, name calling and slowness live in the back of my mind. It’s big and bulky. It’s going convenient and doesn’t fit everywhere. Stairs and doors are a problem. Washrooms are a nightmare. People stare at you with their puppy dog eyes. Children want to ask questions but their parents hurry them away. Line-ups, casher’s and carrying things. Don’t work anymore. The walker appears to be conversation starter- like I want to talk about why I have it. And talk about the day that my life changed forever.
I have accepted it. It’s who I am. I’ve personalized it to me. I’ve tried it out and it helped me. It takes the pressure off my muscles and joints causing me to have less pain and more energy. It keeps me upright and doesn’t let me fall. It was the way it was introduced to me that caused acceptance. The more it’s accepted the more it’ll be used! Because I accept my disability I can see through it, talk about it and make the not normal, normal!
Just like invisible I just want to be heard. I just want to go to the mall and be like everyone else. Talking about how we need to get our eyebrows done and how our nails get chipped needing another pedicure soon with the latest hair styles. This doesn’t happen anymore though because of the visible disabilities.
Next time you see a person with a visible disability be yourself. Hold the door open for them or just press the automatic door button instead of staring at them as they walk up and struggle. As their walking slowly around the mall don’t stream by them. Instead walk around them quietly without stare. Talk to your children and allow them to ask their curious questions. If you teach them young, they will have etiquette for people in the future!
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